Sleepless and dateless in South Florida

Unlike Tom Hanks in Sleepless in Seattle, I don’t have a legitimate reason for my sleepless nights. In the movie, he was mourning the loss of a deceased spouse. I just worry too much. Night and day difference.  

As far as the movie reference goes, hope there are other 80’s babies out there that will appreciate it. To give a rundown of a typical sleepless night for me: I’ll research online about what year Sleepless and Seattle came out (1993, by the way), then I’ll stumble on Tom Papa comedy, which makes me stumble on Seinfeld comedy, then I tell myself I have to write, but then I’m too tired to write or don’t know what I’m meant to write about. After all the internet surfing you also have to keep in mind I’m taking in all that blue light from my cell phone for hours at a time. Lose, lose situation with a dash of overkill. Then like I’m in a faint dream, I see the sunrise. It still feels as glorious as if I didn’t stink from staying up all night. Then my mind thinks I’m supposed to be awake at that point. You see how this ends up being a complete nosedive? I get zero sleep or nights when I’m lucky if l get a few hours.

I’ve tried all the remedies too. Melatonin, Advil PM, and the old fashioned just being utterly exhausted. I’ve grown tolerance to most of these solutions. Now, throw in not dating to the mix, and you’ll understand why I’m searching, or well, at least looking for some writing therapy . The last guy I dated, of course another one that wasn’t my type, was the one I wrote about in my December post, I really like you a lot. This was about him telling me he liked me, when the same feelings weren’t reciprocated on my end. That’s going on six months ago, with no serious dating since 2013, and without a boyfriend since 2010. Yes, 2010. I’m over the sleepless nights. I’m over hearing I have to heal from the past and current relationships first. I’m over feeling I’m just not ready to open the door and receive a respectful, sparking, fireworks kind of love. Come on Universe, it’s been seven plus years.  I’m here on this blog to announce I’m ready. I’m deserving of this. And if some healing has to happen, it will just has to take place  while I’m getting to know my new match.  I’m going to be reminded of the quote below and get outside my comfort zone. I’m going to go entirely outside my comfort zones. Comfort zones are a false sense of security anyways, and nothing, I repeat, nothing ever grows there.  I also smell one more year until a 25th movie anniversary for Sleepless. They don’t make them like that anymore. I’m hopeful for a few movies I saw coming out this year though, one is called The Big Sick. As a side note, I adore Tom Hanks too. He had my heart in this movie, and still has it now with his recent Saturday Night Live skits. And Tom Papa with his, “have you lost weight?… “You’re doing the best you can.” It’s exactly the humor I need to hear right now! What can I say, I love comedy, and like a hybrid fairy and Cherub, I love romance. 

Taking my own advice and giving it out to all of you at the same time: Get out there, take that big leap of faith outside your comfort zone, and watch how fast miracles unfold. 
“People who truly loved once, are far more likely to love again”, Sleepless in Seattle 

SG 

Much needed randomness: The dreams can come true edition 

It’s been a while since I posted a random blog, so here goes since it’s a little overdue:

1. I’m about to finish listening to Oprah and Deepak’s 21 day meditation experience called Getting Unstuck: Creating  a Limitless Life. I highly recommend signing up for their next  21 day meditation and you can sign up for free right through the Deepak Chopra center meditation website and by clicking here. This meditation is ending now, but through Deepak’s wisdom I learned to embrace my true self, be creative and free,  and no longer accept secondhand or mediocre-at-best experiences. I learned in order to live a limitless life I must be an enthusiastic, loving, and nurturing creator of my life. As a cooperative co-creator everything can evolve beautifully in your life and in the world collectively. 

2. I’m halfway through Jenny Lawson’s book called Furiously Happy. What an incredible read so far. You are certain to conjure up every possible emotion known to man probably by the first 30 pages of this book. She takes a deep and personal look inside mental health, especially anxiety and depression, and I dig a writer who is raw like her. When the writing is refreshing and funny like Lawson’s you instantly feel comfortable, like she really is a best friend or family member. She’s big on taxidermy and even though I didn’t relate to this in the least,  she told the stories with such realness, humor, and wit I was laughing out loud to every single word. Her first book Let’s pretend this never happened also comes highly praised by reviewers and will definitely make it on my infinite to-read list.


3. Now let’s dive deeper into mental health, since it was already brought up above…I began the month of August on the right foot because I finally started on aniexty and sleep medications. One prescription is only for aniexty and the other one is for sleep and depression combined. I started them yesterday and I’m already so hopeful. I’ve had sleeping trouble for years now without much luck finding something that solidly works. I’ve used melatonin on a much more regular basis than I should so I’m almost immune to it now. Last year around this time I was working overnight work and was prescribed Ambien. For those of you that have never heard of Ambien: do not take it! Really! Its classified as a hypnotic sedative so that means you can basically sleep walk, talk, eat, have sex etc and do things you have no idea you’re doing. I was a rebel and stayed up on this drug the only time I took it, but fortunately  I only texted (without really wanting to). If you read up you’ll find a plethora of news stories on it that are a lot worse I may add. Driving and getting in a major accident being on Ambien…yep there’s a story out there like that and that happened. By the way, my texting was comparable to drunk texting.  Never again for that particular med, but I have high hopes for the two new ones. Maybe I can meet a guy and him not instantly  think I’m a crazy lady? Dreams can come true, just have to take the baby steps to get there. 

4. If the after life transition is not like the 1991 Albert Brooks movie Defending your life, I’ll be highly disappointed. This movie came to me being half asleep. Also less than 3 or 4 months ago the themes behind the movie Pleasantville came to me in a dream. I don’t know. Maybe a bit more analysis has to go into both?I took more understanding to the Pleasantville ideas even though I don’t know much about that movie as a whole. I personally thought: I’m ready for some nonconformist color to come back and hit me 💖.  Then the verdict in my mind is to definitely rewatch Defending your life. Here’s the classic past lives pavilion scene from Defending: 

The universe has your back-and knows all your wildest dreams, 

SG

Fairytale

To start, what eighties baby and female  doesn’t know the movie Pretty Woman? Come on, Julia Roberts and Richard Gere, solid 1990 release date…a movie so memorable that all these years later it’s labeled a classic. What’s not to love about a prostitute snagging a wealthy suitor? And of course by the end of the flick they fall in love with each other inside the allotted 90 minutes of movie magic time. The reviews call it a classic rags to riches story, but let’s zone in some. By the end of the movie Richard Gere’s character Edward not only falls for Julia Roberts’s character Vivian, but he gives her her idea of a fairytale. 

 Fairytale. That one word defines almost the whole movie! Even how it starts and ends with the guy on the street: “Welcome to Hollywood. What’s your dream?” Believe me, I have given this a lot of thought in the past and I’m rehashing now, well because I’m a rehasher. What I know for sure is I couldn’t be further away from relating to a prostitute in real life, but just like the movie says: “I want the fairy tale.”

I want the fairy tale. I’ll be as bold to say I deserve it. Dream big, always.

 

Female Good Luck Chuck

The main idea behind this in the movie was if you’re a woman and sleep with Chuck, the very next man you meet will be the one you marry. Your one true love. Simple, right?  I only have two prime examples of this happening to me in my life, but these examples are what I have the full knowledge of.  There may be a couple other exes out there I’m just not remembering, or that I don’t know about post break up.

Example one: a pretty recent ex that I just dated in the past year and a half just posted a Facebook picture of their new girlfriend/fiance. Example two: A guy I lived across the street from since I was 10 years old, dated when I was 18, and saw times after that up until 2007, got married shortly after our last meeting in 2007…Coincidence? Sure, why not. In the second example, let me tell you, that relationship moved lightning speed to the marriage point!

glcsyndrome

I will have to release this thought now that I wrote about it!  People come in and out of your life for different reasons. In the theater of life, you play different roles, and I am okay with this being a role I played.  There’s usually always a happy ending in a comedy, and this movie was no exception. I’m going to play off that wisdom. Sometimes real life has to be like the movies, because otherwise, nothing benevolent or magical would ever happen.

One of many Female Good Luck Chucks,

Single Girl

He’s Just Not That Into You…

The debut year for this movie was 2009, really, where does the time go? It flies away!!! I know this film has snippets of great lines and great advice all throughout it, but I just re-watched it the other night and only one scene resonated with me more than the rest. I just related to it so freaking much more than any other scenario in the entire movie.

For those of you not familiar with the movie, the character Gigi hung around for a party that her guy friend Alex threw and she thought she was there as more than a guest. She was pouring her heart out, acting like a sweet, bubbly girlfriend-to-be, putting herself out there that so that Alex would understand she picked up on his signals. The signals he was giving to suggest he liked her. She threw herself at him for a chance at love…and he didn’t respond at all. This all led up to the quote below.  In my opinion, it wins best overall monologue of the entire movie. (Gotta love the cursing too):

Gigi: “I may dissect each little thing and put myself out there so much but at least that means that I still care. Oh! You’ve think you won because women are expendable to you. You may not get hurt or make an ass of yourself that way but you don’t fall in love that way either. You have not won. You’re alone. I may do a lot of stupid shit but I’m still a lot closer to love than you are.”

Closer than yesterday?,

Single Girl (Rules)